BEAM ME UP SCOTTY! Apr. 27/84 Karl Rigelhof

CAPTAIN:
Star date 2154
Our mission:
To infiltrate the Romulan sector
Without detection
Planned deception
To steal their cloaking device
Warp factor 3
Mr. Sulu

SULU:
Aye, aye, Captain

CAPTAIN:
Uhuru: keep all channels free

SPOCK:
Long range scanners
Indicate by their manner
That Romulan ships are approaching

CAPTAIN:
Deflectors full
Battle stations
Spock: compute time until interception

SPOCK:
2.76 minutes

CAPTAIN:
Enough time to win it
Implement plan A
Bones: to the transporter
Spock: take command
If you don't here from us in 2 minutes
Warp out of here
Is that clear

SPOCK:
Live long and prosper, Jim

BONES:
I don't like it Jim
It won't work
Our chances are pretty slim
To beam aboard
Among the Romulan hoard
And take it from right under their noses
I don't trust this thing
God damn transporter
It never works without worrying
Scattering/s ones molecules across the universe
And sticking/s them back together as they were at first
It's not what God had in mind for men

CAPTAIN:
Beam us down Scotty

SCOTTY:
Aye, aye, Captain

BONES:
You may have hope Jim, but not me

CAPTAIN:
You're a cynical old bag of bones
Now it's time to enter the danger zone
Set your phaser on stun

CAPTAIN:
We've done it Bones
Let's get out of here

BONES:
The communicator's not sending tone
Damn contraption
What next Captain

CAPTAIN:
Romulans coming through the door
Look out Bones
Up the hatch

BONES:
We can't get out the other door is blown

CAPTAIN:
Spock, come in Spock
We're stuck in a bad spot
Get us out of here

SPOCK:
Have you located them yet Mr. Scott

SCOTTY:
I've scanned their section, I bet
There they are
They've gone too far
I'm having problems making them materialize

BONES:
What took you so long

CAPTAIN:
Full warp speed
Cloaking device on

BONES:
Well Spock, it's hard for me to say
I thought there'd never come a day
When I'd be glad to see your pointed ears

CAPTAIN:
Well done gentlemen
Mission accomplished
What exactly happened back then

SCOTTY:
The transporter power was shot
We almost lost you if it wasn't for Spock

SPOCK:
It was my cross-switching to B that did it